Bob Mayo, Stonepoint Member
Do you ever wake up in the morning and just feel like your heart is breaking? You may not understand this, but I woke up this morning with just that, a broken heart. It was not my usual thing that I am prone to like, “oh poor me,” or “why can’t I do anything right,” or anything like that. This week has been really hectic and busy but over all I did alright. I could not think of anything that was troubling me. I just woke up thinking about things that break my heart.
Now I admit I am a sensitive dude. Some people around here think too much, but that’s another story. But for some reason when I got up this morning I just hurt for the church in America in general I hurt for the suffering and persecuted Christians around the world and the pains and hurts of individual Christians. I also hurt for all the wrongs that the body of Christ is doing to each other. There seems to be such a lack of true Christian love, grace and unity even within an individual church much less between churches. I know it seems pretty weird to wake up like this, but that is exactly what happened this morning.
But then, another thought crossed my mind. At first I thought that it was weird having these thoughts because there wasn’t really much I could do about them. Yeah, I can pray and should pray, but other than that, what can I do. Then I had another thought, “what about the things you can do something about.” What about disunity in the body? Am I part of the problem? What about loving people who I don’t see eye to eye with? Do I love them? Then even worse, there are some Christians who actually persecute other Christians. Do I pray for them? I don’t mean pray against them, I mean actually pray for them, that God would bless them and so forth. The Bible unapologetically says that we are to do just that. There is a verse that I’ve read many, many times that has just been on my mind a lot lately: “For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh; for the willing is present in me, but the doing of the good is not” (Romans 7:18). Bottom line, I can be, and sometimes am that man!! I am that person who does these things, sometimes without even think I am in the wrong. It’s taken me a long time, but I have finally to believe what this verse says, NOTHING good dwells in my flesh.
I don’t say any of this in from despair or depression. That would have been the case had I written this several months ago. But no more. It stems from a “holy dissatisfaction” with my walk with the Lord. I think I stole that from Paul in Philippians: Not that I have already obtained it or have already become perfect, but I press on so that I may lay hold of that for which also I was laid hold of by Christ Jesus. Brethren, I do not regard myself as having laid hold of it yet; but one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and reaching forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus. (Philippians 3:12-14). Yes, these last few months have been a bit of a struggle. But I think I have begun to learn at least three positive things that I pray will become a big part of my life. First, we cannot trust our flesh, we need to live and walk in the Spirit. Second, we need to quit letting our sins and shame of our past rule over us. Our past sins have been washed away by the blood of Christ. Finally, we need to have a forward look. We need to start looking at ourselves as complete in Christ (Colossians 3:10). Not that we are or ever will be perfect on this earth. But to realize we have everything we need from Christ to have victory over our sinful patterns. May God help us to become the people He desires in His